Critical Reflective Post : "The Role of Peer and Tutor Feedback"

 The Role of Peer and Tutor Feedback

By Park Yechan

   In the English for Academic Purposes (ES1102), we were asked to review and critically evaluate the works done by the classmates, giving feedback about what went well, as well as what could be done to improve the quality of the work. We pointed out the mistakes which often have to do with the structure, the format of the writing, the contents of the essay, and checking the presence of the topic sentence.  

   The purpose of this activity was to help each other to write a better essay. As we gave the feedback to each other, we would constantly have to recall the correct style of writing and format so that we would not end up giving the wrong advice to our friends. 

   The significance of tutor's feedback needs no explanation. It was indeed useful because I got to know where I had gone wrong, so that I would not make the same mistake again when I write essays even for other modules. As university assignments and assessments, most of the time, require one to write a lot (essentially what you will have to do is to state and express your opinion to convince other people), this feedback was especially useful to write in a more convincing way with an appropriate format adopted.    

   The peer review has its own significance too. When I gave the feedback, I developed my critical thinking skills as I had to decide whether I agreed or disagreed with his or her point of view. Even in class, as we shared our opinions and gave feedback to the work done by the classmates, we got to practice speaking out in public. The latest feedback I gave was on the presentation done by one of my classmates. As I gave feedback, I tried to see what went well and what went wrong. When I spoke out, I tried to organize my points in my brain systematically so that those who listened to me would be able to understand what I said more clearly. 

  Overall, the peer and tutor feedback has played a pivotal role in heightening my ability to think critically, and also in making sure that my writing follows the appropriate format with correct structure used throughout. I look forward to applying the knowledge and skills I have learnt from this module, peer and tutor feedback in particular, for better writing in future.  

Presentation Reflection

 This presentation session has indeed benefited me. I felt that I was able to give more mature presentation, with more information clearly delivered to the audiences. I learnt how to be more engaging and project myself, and also to make my Powerpoint slides more audience-friendly. I also learnt that keeping eye-contact with the audiences at all times is important. I always used to look at the screens, while looking at the audiences occasionally.

 However, I also realised that I should work to improve the fluency of my presentation. Since this can only be done by practicing a lot, I should start to take initiative to give presentation in front of many people, and train myself to speak clearly in public.

 Very memorable experience indeed!

Reader's Response Draft [4]

 In a Today Online article, entitled "Can English be a Singaporean mother tongue?", Lu (2013) addresses some of the issues regarding English and mother tongue in Singapore, and carefully evaluates the possibility that English might be recognised as a mother tongue, with so much priority given to it thus far by many members of the young generation. 

 According to Lu, some of the reasons for the observation that English could be considered as a mother tongue for many are due to the fact that too high emphasis on English would not be in line with the government education policy which aims Singaporeans to become effectively bilingual, as well as the low level of recognition by the world that Singapore is a 'native' English-speaking country. He states that proponents of the view that English can be a Singaporean mother tongue also put forth the idea that we experience the linguistic divides caused by the conflicting linguistic interests between younger generation and older generation, who 'generally believe in enduring links between one's biological heritage and cultural practice.'

 Although Lu gives convincing reasons for English to be regarded as our mother tongue in future, I advocate that English should not be designated as a Singapore mother tongue.

 In the 3rd reason for English to be a Singaporean mother tongue, he mentions that Singapore is yet to receive enough recognition from the world that it is an English-speaking country with its citizens speaking English fluently. However, he also should not forget the current economics movement that is taking place in the world right now. Many countries, including Western countries who require Singaporeans to take their English proficiency test to make sure that candidates have good command of English before they can be considered admitted to the school, are in fact investing a huge sum of money into various industries in Singapore. This is because Singaporeans are capable human resources with relatively high command of English, compared to their counterparts in other regions in Asia. As English is already regarded as the global language, which is essential in various areas, such as business, economics and even politics, human resources with the ability to speak English was highly sought after, and this is the reason why Singapore became highly successful in attracting many foreign investors from all over the world. An emphasis on English was the key reason why Singapore managed to outdo its neighbouring countries in terms of economics and raising the standard of living within itself.

Final Essay

Final Essay

As the 21st century began, the Internet had become an important tool in many major areas such as in politics, in business, or even in daily communication. The Internet has played a vital role in bringing people from all over the globe to be connected with each other through the social networking websites such as Facebook, and Twitter. Singapore government has also used the Internet as an opportunity to better deliver public services, and connect with citizens and businesses.  The Internet has also enabled the government to connect with its citizens through online platforms and social media.  Within this context, similar to many of younger generation who have gone through the education significantly aided by ICT digital technology, many of older generation or population which was virtually bypassed by the electronic revolution, mainly retired or close to retirement, do feel that it is necessary to have computer skills. Due to the aging process, however, learning those computer skills is not an easy task for them. Because of the digital divide between the government who is trying to move towards the digital platform and some of the older generation who do not have the knowledge to use it, the Ministry of Social and Family Development and the Ministry of Education should work on integrating the older generation into online community with our own Singapore students participating in the project. This essay seeks to point out the problem caused by the digital divide between generations, and present the possible solution to it. The government is using the digital divide but the problem is that some people cannot access. As the ICT technology keeps upgrading to better cater to the needs by many people, the ways to handle those products get increasingly complicated. The instructions found in the new application in the Internet such as Google Chrome, or Ping are using many technical words most of the time, and this makes older generation difficult to use it effectively. As mentioned earlier, a significant proportion of the older generation had gone through the education system with a relatively low level of aid by IT (if not, not at all for some) , so they often find these new upgrades of technology difficult to follow up. This poses a problem, as older generation may not continue to use the perpetually-changing programmes in the long run.  General Household survey (Straits Times Interactive, 2006) revealed that the number of elderly living alone shot up from 15000 to 22000. Older generation might feel lonely as they do not have many people to talk with, and this problem can be even more worsened by current social problem in which older generation and younger generation do not live together. With Internet increasingly used in major activities including public services, older generation who do not have computer skills may be left out and deprived of participation due to their inability to use the Internet. The most effective way for older generation to interact with other people and get updated independently is through the Internet.   There is currently an attempt to promote IT literacy among senior citizens. According to RADM(NS) Lui Tuck Yew, Senior Minister of State, Ministry of Information, Communications and The Arts, and Ministry of Education, two new IT learning hubs termed as the Silver Infocomm Junctions (SIJ), have been established to help senior citizens to learn IT literacy (Amelia, 2014). Although I feel that this is a good attempt, it could be even better.   School students could be invited to teach the older generation (as part of Community Involvement Programme which is compulsory activity to be fulfilled)Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSF)and Ministry of Education (MOE) could collaborate together to organise the activity to help the older generation to be able to master the skills of using the Internet, taught by students who have right computer knowledge. In this way, students can learn to communicate effectively with the older generation as they teach them, and understand the common problems that these members of the older generation face when handling the Internet. This will in turn make students able to treat their own grandparents with better understanding. Older generation can also benefit greatly, as they learn the skills to bring themselves into the online social circle to be kept in touch with their friends, and family members for those who are not living with their children. This will yield a win-win situation for both students and older generation.  In conclusion, it would require a lot of effort to overcome the problem, 'digital divide'. The Ministry of Education should work to minimise this problem of digital divide. At the same time, the older generation should also take the initiative to learn as much as possible to help themselves.   References Channels : New IT Learning Centres for seniors in Singapore (2008, 28 Nov) Retrieved from http://www.futuregov.asia/articles/new-it-learning-centres-for-seniors-in-singapore The Straits Times Interactive : Sharp rise in the number of elderly living alone (2006, Aug 2) Retrived from : http://www.touch.org.sg/files/news020806.pdf

Essay from other modules (JS1101)

This essay is the individual research paper for Introduction to Japanese Studies [JS1101], written entirely by me.)

Low Birth Rate in Japan

 Perhaps, the hottest media phrase in Japan back in 1990 would be '1.57 Shock' which indicated the unprecedentedly low fertility rate : 1.57 lifetime births per woman (Atoh, 2003). After the '1.57 shock' in 1990, the government in Japan tried to come up with the policies to tackle the low birth rate, but they did not seem to have alleviated the situation much afterwards, with the Total Fertility Rate of 1.43 in 2013 (JAPANTODAY, 2013). If the low birth rate continues, the working generation will be shrunk in future. This will lead to various problems, such as insufficient men to work for maintaining the nation's economic progress.

Reasons for Low Birth Rate

 1) The statistics showed that, for women who gave birth for the first time, approximately 67% of them are out of job after half a year (Kyoudousyakai Chousakekka). The working environment in Japan seems to make it very difficult for women to work and raise her child simultaneously.

2) The cost of raising a child is also a critical factor which contributed to the low birth rate in Japan.

·         According to the survey conducted by KouShouRouDouSyou, 70% responded that the reason for not having the number of children they want is because of the high cost that they could not afford. For example, it costs nearly  ¥20,000,000 (S$ 234,000) for education from the kindergarten to the university.

·         According to the White Paper in 2008, the monthly cost of education is ¥41,000, which is equal to 11.9% of the entire living expenses of the household.  Moreover, the cost of the education has been increasing.

3) The statistics from Koyoukintou(2011) shows that the number of hours husbands in Japan are committed to doing the house work (washing, cleaning the house, or gardening etc) when the wives are working and when the wives are not working showed little difference ; in both cases, it was below 1 hour. This indicates that the wives in Japan are doing most of the housework without significant help from their husbands. On top of the housework, wives in Japan also have to take care of their child's education, and this goes to show why they do not wish to increase the number of children due to too heavy a burden.

Current measures taken by Japanese Government and the limitation of them

 On 19 April 2013, Prime Minister Abe made the announcement that  children leave will be extended from 1 year to 3 years. However, I feel that the problem is not the period of children leave, but it is whether they can take it or not. Even when one is qualified to take the children leave, not all of them are able to take it comfortably.

·         According to the statistics given by Kousyouroudousyou in 2012, percentage of women who took the children leave is 83.6% which is considerably high. However, this number is not accurate because the denominator is extremely limited in the sense that they failed to take into consideration of those women who have not been working while they are pregnant, or who are freelance or  who work in house or who have been even working but not qualified to take the children leave. In fact, the survey showed that only 13.2% of women feel comfortable to take the children leave (Kyoudousyakai Syousikataisaku, 2009). Even those who are actually qualified to take the leave, they cannot take it because it would be difficult to again go back to the work or difficult to take because the companies for which they have been working for lack workforce. Those whose positions after the leave are guaranteed are mostly full-time employee or  permanent employee in the company or the government employee, and most of the time, women have to either give up the position they have been taking or just leave the company. As mentioned earlier, the cost of living and education is increasing and it would not be easy for the couple to raise a child without  both working.

Conclusion

  As mentioned earlier, low birth rate is a serious social problem that needs to be alleviated as much as possible. It is the first few years after the child was born that women need to take special care. The working environment should be also changed so that women can continue their career even after they take the leave.

Reference

·         Atoh. M , Akachi. M (2003) "Low Fertility and Family Policy in Japan"

Retrieved from:

 http://www.ipss.go.jp/webj-ad/webjournal.files/population/2003_6/1.Atoh.pdf

·         JAPANTODAY (2014) "Japan's fertility rate rise to 1.43 in 2014"

Retrieved from:

http://www.japantoday.com/category/national/view/japans-fertility-rate-rises-to-1-43-in-2013

·         Kyoudousyakai Seisakutoukatsukan - chousakekka (Survey Result)

(last assessed on 24/10/2014)

Retrieved from:

http://www8.cao.go.jp/shoushi/cyousa/cyousa20/ikou/2_2_04.html

·         Japan Institution of Life Insurance (last assessed on 24/10/2014)

Retrieved from:

http://www.jili.or.jp/lifeplan/lifeevent/birth/5.html

·         Hataraku zyoseino jitsuzyou (current statistics about women who are working)

Retrieved from:

http://www.mhlw.go.jp/bunya/koyoukintou/josei-jitsujo/dl/11gaiyou.pdf (2011, page 12)

·         Hakusyo (2008) - White paper

Retrieved from :

 http://www5.cao.go.jp/seikatsu/whitepaper/h20/10_pdf/01_honpen/

Essay Draft [2]

As the 21st century began, the Internet has become an important tool in many major areas such as in politics, in business, or even in daily communication. The Internet has played a vital role in bringing people from all over the globe to be connected with each other on the Web through the social networking websites such as Facebook, and Twitter.  Singapore has also used the Internet as an opportunity to better deliver public services, and connect with citizens and businesses.  The Internet also enabled our government to connect with its citizens through online platforms and social media.  However, compared to the younger generation who have gone through the education significantly aided by technology, the older generation or population which was virtually bypassed by the electronic revolution, mainly retired or close to retirement, do feel that it is necessary to have computer skills. Due to the aging process, however, learning those computer skills is not an easy task for them. This essay seeks to point out the problem caused by the digital divide between generations, and the possible solution to it. As the technology keeps upgrading to better cater to the needs by many people, the ways to handle those products get increasingly complicated. The instructions found in the new application in the Internet such as Google Chrome, or Ping are using many technical words most of the time, and this makes older generation difficult to use it effectively. As mentioned earlier, a significant proportion of the older generation had gone through the education system with a relatively low level of aid by IT (if not, not at all for some) , so they often find these new upgrades of technology difficult to follow up. Therefore, this poses a problem, as older generation may not continue to use the perpetually-changing programmes in the long run, and eventually be left out of the social circle.  General Household survey revealed that the number of elderly living alone shot up from 15000 to 22000. Older generation might feel lonely as they do not have many people to talk with, and this problem can be even more worsen by current social problem in which older generation and younger generation do not live together. With Internet increasingly used in major activities including public services, older generation who do not have computer skills may be left out and deprived of participation due to their inability to use the Internet. The most effective way for older generation to interact with other people and get updated independently is through the Internet.  There is currently an attempt to promote IT literacy among senior citizens. According to RADM(NS) Lui Tuck Yew, Senior Minister of State, Ministry of Information, Communications and The Arts, and Ministry of Education, two new IT learning hubs termed as the Silver Infocomm Junctions (SIJ), have been established to help senior citizens to learn IT literacy (Amelia, 2014). Although I feel that this is a good attempt, it could be even better by changing the plan a little bit.  Instead of hiring the professionals, school students could be invited to teach the older generation (as part of Community Involvement Programme which is compulsory activity to be fulfilled)Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSF) and Ministry of Education (MOE) could collaborate together to organise the activity to help the older generation to be able to master the skills of using the Internet, taught by students who have right computer knowledge. In this way, students can learn to communicate effectively with the older generation as they teach them, and understand the common problems that these group of older generation face when handling the Internet. This will in turn make students able to treat their own grandparents with better understanding. Older generation can also benefit greatly, as they learn the skills to bring themselves into the online social circle to be kept in touch with their friends, and family members for those who are not living with their children. This will yield a win-win situation for both students and older generation.  In conclusion, it would require a lot of effort to overcome the problem, 'digital divide'. The ministry of Social and Family Development and the ministry of education should work on integrating older generation into online community with our own students participating in the project. As the saying goes, 'it needs two hands to clap', the older generation should also take the initiative to learn as much as possible.   References http://www.futuregov.asia/articles/new-it-learning-centres-for-seniors-in-singapore http://www.touch.org.sg/files/news020806.pdf

Essay Draft [1]

ESSAY DRAFT 1

 As the 21st century began, the Internet has become an important tool in many major area such as in politics, in business, or even in daily communication. The Internet has played a vital role in bringing people from all over the globe to be connected with each other on the Web through the social networking websites such as Facebook, and Twitter. However, such benefits seem to be enjoyed mainly by the younger generation who have gone through the education aided significantly by technology. The older generation whose main method of education was dominantly a 'pen-and-paper' mode apparently find adapting to this new era difficult. According to the statistics, only about 30 per cent of Americans over the age of 65 use the Internet, and this compares to nearly 90 per cent of young generation in America using the Internet. The government tries to come up with the solution to bridge the gap between this two groups of people, and the attempt by the community centres to train the older generation to use the basic function of the Internet seems to have done good for the older generation. However, I personally feel that there are more ways to help more of the older people to use the Internet so that they will not be left 'isolated' from this perpetually-progressing society. 

 As the technology keeps upgrading to better cater to the needs by many people, the ways to handle those products get increasingly complicated. The instructions found in the new application in the Internet such as Google Chrome, or Ping are using many technical words most of the time, and this makes older generation difficult to use it effectively. As mentioned earlier, a significant proportion of the older generation had gone through the education system with a relatively low level of aid by IT (if not, not at all for some) , so they often find these new upgrades of technology difficult to follow up, compared to the younger generation who are rather more acceptive to such changes. Therefore, this poses a problem, as older generation may not continue to use the perpetually-changing programmes in the long run, and be left out of the online social circle. So, they might feel lonely as they have not many people to talk with, and this problem can be even more worsen by a 'small family' which is a current social problem in which older generation and younger generation do not live together.

 Government can organise the campaign/programme/activity to help the older generation to be able to master the skills of using the Internet. Instead of hiring the professionals, school students could be invited to teach the older generation (as part of Community Involvement Programme which is compulsory activity to be fulfilled). In this way, students can learn to communicate effectively with the older generation as they teach them, and understand the common problems that these group of older generation face when handling the Internet. This will in turn make students able to treat their own grandparents with better understanding. Older generation can also benefit greatly, as they learn the skills to bring themselves into the online social circle to be kept in touch with their friends, and family members for those who are not living with their children. This will yield a win-win situation.